Update on our family’s transition

Six moths ago, by the beginning of April 2018, our entire family was living full time in America. We have been mostly quiet as we try to live in America. Until 3 weeks ago we lived in my brother’s basement room...all 5 of us in a 200 square foot room. We are incredibly grateful for the time that they allowed our family to stay with them, I’m not sure what we would have done without them. And at the same time we are VERY glad to have our own space. We found a nice townhouse to rent near where our home was when we lived in the states before. 

Shane found a job in September and is working for Mount Olivet in Chanhassen. He is an IT Manager for this little non-profit that works with special-needs adults. This company is loving on Shane and its slow pace is allowing him to catch up from the last 5 years out of the IT world. 

Austin, Sierra and Landen are going to a homeschool co-op in Roseville. They enjoying the social aspect while still keeping the flexibility of being homeschooled. Austin has been working at a grocery store as a bagger since May. He has discovered  the freedom of having his own money and we are hoping that he will soon have his own license so he can do some carpooling. Sierra has been babysitting and thriving with the social aspect of school. Landen has discovered that he does pretty well in a school setting and is enjoying the success.

I am still going to school for my masters in Marriage and Family Therapy. I have around 11 months left. This last year is busy with classes, 3 hours of supervision a week and seeing clients weekly. While its a little overwhelming I absolute love being a Therapist. Its challenging, exciting and is different every day. 

Haiti/America Random

-We find that our family is still at the Haiti pace and is completely comfortable staying home. 

-While all of America is trying to downsize we are working on accumulating the basics...not a bad place to be actually. 
-Driving in America is ridiculously easy and I constantly have to remind myself to pay attention. 

-The grocery stores are so close... plus Chinese takeout.  

-Today it snowed...I’m not sure how to do this winter thing again. 

-Streaming a movie actually takes the time of the movie and doesn't pause.
-Walking outside without being stared at.

Our trip to South Dakota. 

Escape Room

ValleyFair

Sierra and I got to learn about the struggles of Somalian Refugees. 

Working at Papa & Nana's farm. 

We get to volunteer at a local food shelf twice a month. 

Haiti revisited...just a little more authentic

I look at that last blog post and its all true. But I think there needs to be a little more authenticity.

I didn’t want to go back to Haiti. In fact, three days before I was supposed to leave I began to have nightmares, my stomach started to act up and I kept breaking down in tears. At 10pm, the night before my 6 am departure, I was still not packed and was debating calling the entire thing off.

Why? I think there are a ton of reasons. One is that we are still not settled into this American life. We are still struggling to figure out our place and our new normal. Another is that you have to put on a layer of protection to go to Haiti; emotional and physical. There are horrifyingly sad things happening there daily and when I go back I will be seeing them face to face again. There is an element of danger in Haiti and this comes with the need to be vigilant and aware of my surroundings. I have enjoyed being able to let my guard down and just be while living in America.

But, I did go back. The very first night we had no power at the house I was staying in. It was probably 92 degrees (at least) in the bedroom and the homes are situated so closely together that almost no breeze passes through. It. Was. Miserable. I enjoy the heat,  and yet Haiti’s lack of options that makes hard. Its just hot. All. The. Time. Relief comes only when traveling by car.

Then it was like I was home. Only Haiti isn’t my home and never really was. Yet I can be comfortable there. I know how to speak the language, I can travel by moto, I have friends that I get ot visit (Haitian and American), I know how to buy my food. It was ‘home’ for almost 5 years. So I worked with Bob and Daphne, we did our Elevate stuff and visits and it was good.

At the same time, the sadness of some of the families’ situations hit harder than it did when I lived there. I am no longer bombarded with the sadness and injustices on a daily basis. Its almost like I wasn’t able to put the wall up completely or my capacity to absorb the sadness was greater so it got a little deeper. Its really the cost of caring. I’m glad that I have a deeper capacity now to feel it and be present. I know that it was one of the reasons that leaving Haiti was right for us. The sadness and hard things that are all around you in Haiti started to make me feel a little numb. It was necessary for survival, yet I didn’t and don’t like it.

A week later, I boarded the plane and headed back to the land of cheese, airconditioners and mostly good drivers. Back to our one room in my brother’s basement. I am grateful and teary at the same time.

Haiti revisited

Its been 2 1/2 months since we moved back to America. Our life is still in quite a bit of transition as Shane works to find a job, I deal with the mountains of paperwork for the kids (and my) school next year and my clinicals and our kids still desire to have a solid group of friends. Our cars have both managed to need pretty big repairs and sometimes it feels like we brought our Haiti vehicle issues with us. Yet, overall things are pretty great.

I have weekly hour-long phone calls with Bob and Daphne about Elevate, our micro-loan program. We talk about payments they have received, how the families are doing, who needs some additional encouragement or help, school sponsorships, and Ti-Elevate (our kids program). 

Last week, it was time to go to Haiti and visit face to face. Our first order of business was the accounting piece. We went throug all of the books to make sure that their numbers matched up with mine and there were 3 errors...all of them mine. This is a huge win! I am so hopeful and excited about how seriously they have taken this part of Elevate. 

Together we identified who needed to receive a new loan, visited 4 different potential new Elevate micro-loan recipients, took pics of the kids that will be sponsored for school and visited some of their businesses to verify their purchases and that they are continuing to sell. It was hot, sweaty, dusty, and thirsty business. I took a moto most places in our little area (not my favorite thing to do but it was easier and way cheaper). We walked about a billion miles...maybe not a billion but in Haiti heat it feels like it. Bob and Daphne each had lunch made for us at their homes. We sat together and laughed together and enjoyed being in the same room breathing the same air. 

After this week I believe that Elevate will be able to continue. 

I believe that the work Elevate and Bob and Daphne are doing is valuable and right. We had another one of our recipients accept Jesus as her savior. This is the reasons we are doing this job. To show Jesus’ love to them. To keep families together. To empower them to be able to take care of themselves. To show that there is hope. 

Our job isn’t done yet!

So how’s the transition going?

Its been four weeks since we packed two suitcases per person and took a plane to leave Haiti without a return flight. We no longer live as missionaries. Its a strange thing really. When we were missionaries everything we did seemed phenomenal to those in America, even our daily living was different. Now we are back and we are invisible. I don’t really miss the attention we got as missionaries, it was never deserved. But it has been interesting to observe. (I can’t say this so I put a line through it so it’s invisible...works, right?)

Our time has been spent sick, seems every time we come to America we catch the local bug...our immune systems are out of practice fighting American germs. But that isn’t such a bad thing as it makes us slow down and not jump in too fast. 

We found a great homeschool co-op for next year. We were able to sit in on the classrooms while they were in session. This is a blessing because my kids can imagine what it will be like next year. They are excited to have the community and the extra teacher help. I’m grateful for this little co-op because they are going to help me with transcripts and class planning and offer a wide range of activities. 

Landen has expressed a desire to learn sign-language. We had a couple live in our guesthouse for the last year that work with the Haiti Deaf Academy so we have been exposed to the deaf culture. This is the first time Landen has seen anything that peaked his interest and this co-op has an ASL class! Sierra wants to get into drama and voice lessons which are also available at the co-op. We are working on getting her in a summer camp if time and funds allow. Austin is excited to have a better science teacher, ha! I am seriously lacking in this area. The co-op has a great PSEO program and partners with 4 different colleges. This is a great way for Austin to get started as he gets acclimated back into school communities. 

Shane is actively looking for a job. Its really too bad that going to coffee, networking, emailing, applying and job fairs don’t pay...we would be rich. Our life is on hold until Shane finds a job but we truly trust God to bring one at just the right time. We have found that God loves to wait until the last minute so that He gets the glory, we can’t decide what the last minute is so we wait. 

In May, I start my internship in the field of Marriage and Family Therapy. I still have a little over a year left to get my Masters but need to start accumulating 500 counseling hours so that I can graduate. I am so excited to be able to begin working! I started this journey in 2011 and its fun to be on this side of things. I go to an online school called Northcentral University where, the more I learn, the more I am grateful for the solid education they are supplying. 

We are living with my brother, his wife and two girls in their basement. We sleep in a 20x10’ room and they have mostly given us their downstairs living room and bathroom. Our plan is to move out as soon as Shane gets a job. However, we can tell that God is protecting the relationships and it is going really well. We are so grateful that we have a place to stay while we transition back. 

Elevate is still going strong. I have weekly phone meetings with Bob and Daphney. I’m finding that my patience is returning as I start to feel like I have more margins in my life. We hade two micro-loan recipients that have been ill and have been struggling with repayment so Bob and Daphney, respectively, brought them to a hospital with volunteer American doctors. We found out that one of them who has been complaining of stomach problems has no physical ailments. The doctors believe that it is an emotional issue. Please pray for him if you think about it. 

At the beginning of April we paid for Bob and Daphney to go to a Train the Trainer weekend conference. They were excited to learn of new ways to help teach business to those that are living in deep poverty. They were given the workbook to take home and begin to utilize. This is perfect timing as we started 10 new loans last month. Their first monthly meeting is today, 4/22 and I can’t wait to hear how the loans recipients are doing and to hear how the new training works with this group. I was most encouraged to see how excited and energized Bob and Daphney were after the weekend. They felt valued, equipped and appreciated. Makes me think I need to get creative so that we can keep encouraging them in ways like this. 

We are working on a monthly budget for Elevate. If you are a donor and are interested in this, please email me so we can share. Our financial needs for Elevate to continue are around $2,000 a month, so please consider joining (or staying) on our financial team. 

Traveling. 

Milo is now an American citizen. 

Our ‘home’ for now. 

Bob and Daphney on the far right at the training. 

It’s been 5 years since Landen had a birthday in America 

So much snow. 

Exciting changes for 2018!

Friends, we are so excited to share our news officially. First of all, I’m gonna give you some bullet-points and if you want to hear it in more detail you can check below. 

• Our Elevate employees are awesome and we have worked ourselves out of a job!
• Elevate will continue with quarterly visits from us. 
• I am over 1 year into the process of getting my masters in Marriage and Family Therapy
• We are moving back to Minnesota this Spring 2018. 
• Prayer requests and some family needs

Our Elevate Employees are awesome and we have worked ourselves out of a job. 

Bob and Daphne, over the last year, have taken over every aspect of running and maintaining Elevate. We are so thrilled; they understand the vision of Elevate is to transform families, they are passionate about being in relationships with people even when its hard, and they love Jesus with their entire being. 

This is a good thing! It is so much more empowering if Haiti has Haitian people helping Haitian people instead of a white ‘savior’. Haitians are smart and resourceful and strong. We love that our employees are the ones mentoring the Elevate families. 

Elevate will continue with quarterly visits from us. 

Almost all of our current financial givers have committed to continue giving towards Elevate (still tax deductible). This means even more money will be able to go directly to the Haitian people instead of helping us live here! Our personal involvement will continue, once we move to America, we will have weekly phone meetings and will visit Haiti quarterly to do face to face vision casting and visiting families. This is the goal of most missions and we were able to attain it within 3 years of starting Elevate!

I am over 1 year into the process of getting my masters in Marriage and Family Therapy. 

This is the catalyst for this decision to move back to America so I am going to give a short version of the long story...or at least try. In 2011 I felt that God was asking me to become a Marriage and Family Therapist. I have to be honest and say that I was reluctant to take on the debt and the work, but God showed me that this was his will without a doubt. So I went back to school to finish my bachelors degree. As of August 2016 I received a bachelors degree in Biblical Studies (I highly recommend this since its like cheating...getting a degree to study the Bible, um yes!). I planned on starting my masters program immediately but upon further research I realized that there was no way for me to become licensed while living in Haiti, and the process to become licensed is about 3 years and 5000 hours of supervised counseling. 

Shane and I prayed about what the right decision was and finally decided that I had begun this journey in 2011 and the original calling had not changed, so we would move back to America. In February 2017 I started working towards my masters online at Northcentral University (love this school!). From that time on we began to intentionally groom our Haitian employees to see if they were capable and interested in continuing Elevate. They were and shocked us with their intentionality and dedication to continue Elevate. 

We are moving back to Minnesota this Spring 2018

So, with all of the previous points shared, we are moving back. People ask us if we are excited, and the answer is yes. We have been planning for this for 1 1/2 years so we are ready. We are spending these last months in country spending time with our friends and doing all the things we love. We talk a lot about what we have enjoyed while living here, what we have learned, how God has blessed us because we have been and will continue to strive to be obedient. 

We know from experience, being a missionary doesn’t make you God’s favorite, being in a relationship with Him does. 

We know from experience that being a missionary doesn’t make you more holy or a better Christian, we are too aware of our personal and family brokenness to be able to maintain that illusion. 

We know from experience that being a missionary is what each of us is called to do, where we are. Being a missionary is loving God with all of our heart, loving others and sharing the Gospel whenever we can. We will continue this call in America. 

Prayer requests and Family needs 

The first prayer request is for a job for Shane. He has been actively looking for a job in his previous field as a Senior IT manager. Please pray that God opens some doors. 

The second need is a home to rent. We are looking for a 3 bedroom, 1 1/2 bathroom home to rent in the Lino Lakes, Hugo, WBL, Wyoming, Vadnais Heights area. If you know of a home we would greatly appreciate the help. 

The third prayer request is for protection of our family as we transition. Transitions are tricky and although we’ve had some practice, being nice to one another in the transition is something to be prayed for. 

The fourth prayer request is for our Haitian employees and friends. We would ask that they continue to understand the love of God and that they grow in wisdom. 

Finally, we ask for prayers for our expat friends. Living overseas means many goodbyes and it’s hard. Ask that God fills the gaps that our family’s leaving brings in surprising but wonderful ways. 

What exactly does Elevate do?

"They" say that December is the biggest giving month. So I thought I would take this time to remind everyone what Elevate is, and why we believe in what it does.

Elevate is a micro-loan program. We, our Haitian employees, identify families living in deep poverty that need a boost. We are looking for parents that want to work, that love their children but we don't require that they are Christians.

Elevate is about family preservation. With most of the orphanages in Haiti filled with children that have parents but can't afford them, we want to support parents in their effort to keep their children. Each Elevate participant is screened to identify housing needs, food needs, and school needs (no public schools in Haiti). We do this because if the family's basic needs aren't taken care of, the loan will fail and so will their business...which means their family does not thrive.

Elevate is about bringing hope. Our number one goal is to bring the eternal hope of Jesus to each of our recipients. We are finding that this takes time, trust, and lots of love. Its messy but Jesus was all about relationships and we use Him as our standard.

Elevate is a small program...on purpose. We want to go deep with the families that are part of Elevate so that we can help make a lasting change in their economics, families, and eternity. 

Elevate currently has 43 active micro-loans. 29 of them are incredibly successful and are ready for a larger loan to continue to build their business. Needs range from $50-150 each loan.

We invite you to join Elevate with a financial donation. No amount is too small!

Is it worth it?

As of this October we have been living in Haiti for four years. Sometimes it feels like an eternity, sometimes like a blink of an eye. At each year's anniversary I look back and try to assess whether we are still following God's call on our lives. One of the biggest questions I ask is, are we making a difference for the Kingdom of Christ? Sometimes it feels like I spend all of my days doing chores that would take an hour in America. Sometimes its so hot, and I'm just so tired, that I want to hide. Sometimes when someone knocks at our gate, I want to ignore it, because usually a knock is someone asking for something and deciding if I say 'yes' or 'no' takes energy I just don't have.

Are we making a difference? Why should we stay here for another year, is it worth it?

I started to catalog some experiences that we have had the last couple of months to remind myself that yes, it is we are working to make a difference. The difference doesn't look like it did in the beginning of our time in Haiti. It has more depth to it and seems to be coming about because of the relationships we have built over these last four years.

Its the married couple that trusts us enough to ask for marriage counseling.

Its the troubled orphan living with her sister who just needs funding to go to a trade-school so she can feel some hope for her future. 

It is encouragement given to other missionaries that are struggling.

Its the family that has gone from abject poverty to now eating regularly, all children going to school, and the mom learning a business.

It is our Elevate employees spending the time to get to know the recipients so that they can encourage and identify those that need extra help.

It is teaching what it means to show love to your kids to those stuck in a poverty cycle of neglect and abuse.

It is 18 children that are going to school this year.

It is the man that stops by to clean our yard and harvest our coconuts who  paid and then is always gifted with the extra coconuts so he can sell them.

It is the relationships. That is why we are here. Jesus said that the main message taught in Scriptures is to

"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself'" Luke 10:27.

If being a kingdom family is about loving others in relationships, then I believe our time is not wasted. My job is to love, its God's job to use me to make a difference.