Is it worth it?

As of this October we have been living in Haiti for four years. Sometimes it feels like an eternity, sometimes like a blink of an eye. At each year's anniversary I look back and try to assess whether we are still following God's call on our lives. One of the biggest questions I ask is, are we making a difference for the Kingdom of Christ? Sometimes it feels like I spend all of my days doing chores that would take an hour in America. Sometimes its so hot, and I'm just so tired, that I want to hide. Sometimes when someone knocks at our gate, I want to ignore it, because usually a knock is someone asking for something and deciding if I say 'yes' or 'no' takes energy I just don't have.

Are we making a difference? Why should we stay here for another year, is it worth it?

I started to catalog some experiences that we have had the last couple of months to remind myself that yes, it is we are working to make a difference. The difference doesn't look like it did in the beginning of our time in Haiti. It has more depth to it and seems to be coming about because of the relationships we have built over these last four years.

Its the married couple that trusts us enough to ask for marriage counseling.

Its the troubled orphan living with her sister who just needs funding to go to a trade-school so she can feel some hope for her future. 

It is encouragement given to other missionaries that are struggling.

Its the family that has gone from abject poverty to now eating regularly, all children going to school, and the mom learning a business.

It is our Elevate employees spending the time to get to know the recipients so that they can encourage and identify those that need extra help.

It is teaching what it means to show love to your kids to those stuck in a poverty cycle of neglect and abuse.

It is 18 children that are going to school this year.

It is the man that stops by to clean our yard and harvest our coconuts who  paid and then is always gifted with the extra coconuts so he can sell them.

It is the relationships. That is why we are here. Jesus said that the main message taught in Scriptures is to

"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself'" Luke 10:27.

If being a kingdom family is about loving others in relationships, then I believe our time is not wasted. My job is to love, its God's job to use me to make a difference.